My BSF Testimony

For those of you who do not know, I attend a weekly Bible Study called Bible Study Fellowship. I have just completed a 30 week study on Isaiah! It was so AWESOME and God taught me so many things. The following is what I shared with my class on Tuesday.

Note to the reader: Isaiah went around completely naked for several years of his ministry as a symbol of Israel's shame. This will make sense as you keep reading! And Juanita is my BSF teaching leader.

Hope you enjoy hearing what God has done in my life lately! Last week before our last class, I asked my family if they thought God had changed anything in me during this study. My husband, without missing a beat, said absolutely! He went on to say that I had definitely become a “more radical extremist” about the end of the world, but that I hadn’t started running around naked yet! Thanks for that! Seriously, God has taught me so much this year. It has just been an amazing study, but there is one particular circumstance that I want to share with you this morning. My husband and I have 3 boys – 7, 4, and 1. Our oldest son’s name is Joel and he has a speech disorder – he stutters. We have been in and out of therapy for years and the general consensus of all the therapists now is that he will most likely not grow out of it, but with therapy will be able to control it. This journey has had its ups and downs. There are times he does great and other times where he literally cannot communicate with us. I know stuttering is not life threatening, but anytime there is something wrong with your child – it is hard. God has taught me so much thru the years that we have been going through this. But, this year He came through for me in a way like never before. Joel was really struggling right before Christmas. Nothing we had learned in therapy was working or helping him. His frustration level and ours was through the roof. He was to the point where he really couldn’t even get out an entire sentence. It was terrible. I was sinking deeper and deeper into despair over it. God has taught me in the past through His word that my feelings are not always reality. Even though I felt hopeless, I did know I had hope in Him. I had been studying Isaiah 25-27 all week and praying for a breakthrough, but my feelings had not changed. I came to BSF literally a wreck on the inside. Peace and hope definitely did not describe me that day. On top of all that, I felt so weak. God has brought me through so much and I know other women look to me as a leader in my church and here I was in a pit of despair over my fears for my child’s life. I felt like such a failure to Him and to all the people He had placed in my life. But, during the lecture, Juanita said that “If we belong to Christ, we have perfect salvation, through a perfect Savior. We can have perfect peace and we do have perfect hope.” She went on to tell the story of when her house burned down and how she had lived with a lady for a few weeks while she tried to put her life back together. Only later did Juanita find out during that time the lady she was staying with had lost almost everything in the oil crisis. That strong Christian woman was truly living out Isaiah 26:3 “You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast because he trusts in you.” While Juanita was telling her story, tears started running down my face. I want to share with you what I wrote in my notes: “This is a person who has a single focus on God himself – freedom from self. We can focus on others because we know that God has us taken care of. This is not me! God help me!” I began praying that God would make that verse true in my life, confessing to Him I knew it wasn’t true of me now. I asked Him to turn my focus away from myself and my child’s problems and to HIM! Juanita closed the lecture that day by quoting the words to Because He Lives. I don’t know any other way to describe my experience other than to say that while she was quoting that hymn, the Lord Jesus Christ literally came and got me out of the pit I was in. Life is worth the living just because He lives. He picked me up and I am so thankful. This was literally a turning point for me in my relationship with Him. I am convinced that when we ask Him to make His word true about our lives – He will. I left BSF different than I came in. When I got home, Joel's speech had not changed, but God had changed me! My outlook was totally different. Even if Joel stutters the rest of his life, I know God holds him in the palm of His hand. I want to give God all glory and honor for everything He has done in my life this year. He truly is a perfect Savior and a perfect friend.